Let me just preface this with I don’t believe in perfection, but my fiancée is as close to perfection as I can get in terms of my partner in crime for life. You’ll also have to excuse some of my hetero skewed thoughts. At the end of the day I really don’t give a damn about anyone’s sexual orientation, but what I do care about is people being able to get along with their spouse/life mate.
Everyone needs to eat and unless you have a healthy pocket book or desire to go down early from blocked arteries eating out every night just isn’t an option. I suggest one of you be a decent cook.
I may get in trouble for this one, but if you stack my cooking skills against my future wife’s she’s got me beat by miles in the baking department, but when it comes down to dinner and such I’ll most likely outshine her. Scouting kick started learned life skills early for me and cooking was a central part of the troop I grew up in.
However, since I have no desire to be the primary meal creator in the house and I know she can cook I will most likely be the sous to her executive chef. Let me also be clear here that all adults in a household should be competent enough to cook a basic meal without burning the house down. “Mom” will occasionally get sick, need a break, or have their own stuff to take care which will preclude them from creating dinner that day.
Figure out how to divide up chores. I find that everyone does have a task they like to do. Either because they want that task done a specific way or it takes them away from everything else and gives them a few moments of Zen.
I also suggest finding out as much background knowledge on a person as possible. You might find they have a skill that compliments one of yours, you find it interesting and wish to learn more, or is just a bonus for life in general. In my case my fiancée has studied massage therapy. Although not her job anymore that skill set is not wasted. I’m sure everyone is thinking “you lucky bastard you”. Your god damn right I am. She makes dealing with my aches and pains easier, especially with the damage I have done to myself over the years.
However, its a two way street. I am a firm believer of give and take. I have done my best to learn from her so that when she requires a neck massage to relieve the tension of the day or help with a pulled muscle I’m not making the issue worse than it already is.
Let me put it in to perspective here. Find the person that makes you the least homicidal and make it work.