Earning Some Hubby Points

Recently I made a smart move in purchasing some hair scrunchies and stashing them in my truck for the future Mrs. I’ve been kicking around the idea of putting together a list of things to keep in your vehicle for your female life mate and am in process of getting that done. The hair ties is definitely top 10.

If you have long hair, inevitably from my experience at some point in time I will hear, “screw this, or this damn hair, or that’s it I’m cutting it off”, while furiously putting it up in some sort of pony tail. The problem comes when we are traveling in my truck and most likely said hair tie is forgotten.

Well, NO MORE.

Hair ties will be standard kit in my truck probably until I die, because of my fiancée and inevitably one of our future children will most likely be a daughter.

Gentlemen incase you missed the point I am trying to make hear read the next few bold words carefully.


Thank you for your cooperation.

The Force Is Strong With This One

So once again the fiancée has left me to my own devices again this weekend. (YEEAAAAHHHH PAAAARRRRTTYYY). No not really. Worst case scenario I hit the airsoft arena for an all day session followed by sitting at a friends house till the wee hours of the morning shooting the shit and having a couple of cold ones. I know….a real ragger.

However, instead of fighting with her not to bring me something home I relented. ONLY because she sent me a picture of the make your own light saber stand in the place she was shopping. Needless to say with zero objection from her and some help from my future brother in-law a custom light saber will be in my position in a few short days.  (Squeeee.) (Yes, I am knocking on the door of 30 and no I don’t give a shit what you think of me. It’s the Wars bro and that’s all you need to know.)

Gentlemen please take note here. If you find a woman who is willing to put up with you AND WILLINGLY BUYS YOU A CUSTOM LIGHTSABER. SPRINT your ass to nearest jewelry store and buy an engagement ring. I’m more than certain you won’t find anyone better.

Mrs. Fix It

So today I had one of those what I am going to call “proud hubby moments”. My fiancée not only cleared up the low pressure situation in the downstairs shower head of her parents extra bathroom, but also installed a brand new shower head with out issue. I find this spectacular because a majority of the females I know wouldn’t know thing one about basic home repair and would most likely just call a plumber wasting time and money.

No, the future Mrs. did me proud. Took the time to trouble shoot the issue and  cleared out a busted piece of the previous shower head from what I think was two heads ago and installed the new one thus improving both water pressure and water usage.

Here is my point, I expect every adult in the house to be able to trouble shoot and fix basic things like this. Ladies you have been stepping up to the plate a lot lately, keep up the good work. For those of you who haven’t or refuse to we need to have a chat. To the gentlemen in the audience that don’t know the difference between a Flat head and Philips head screwdriver……first off figure that shit out. Second, and this is for everyone who doesn’t know what is what in basic home maintenance, take some classes. I believe Lowes and Home Depot offers them. THIS IS A ZERO EXCUSE AREA as far as I’m concerned.

“If she doesn’t find you handsome, she’ll at least find you handy.” -Red Green

Planning A Wedding

Planning my upcoming nuptials has been a rollercoaster of a ride. Not exactly backwards inverted corkscrews, but a couple of G’s are being bulled on the dives. The one thing I can take away from the experience thus far is to give yourself plenty of time and look at ALL of your options.

When I first proposed to my fiancée we thought about trying to put the wedding together for the June wedding she wanted. It would have given us a little under 10 months to get it together. After realizing all that would need to be accomplished in the short amount of time and a certain key member of the wedding party being out of country until a few months before hand that thought was quickly nixed.

For those of you who are forced to or think planning a wedding in under a year is doable…. good luck. Personally, I think you are higher that a kite in a wind storm, but have at it. I know people have done so , but the amount of stress involved can be crippling. Unless you have the assistance of a wedding planner I seriously caution against it.

Let me be frank and point out that you and your significant other will fight over what is most likely really stupid stuff. This is one of those “believe me I know” moments. The way I have minimized this at least from my hetero males perspective is to help make decisions, but remain minimally involved. To that effect I have said “honey if that’s what you want then that’s what it shall be.”, or something to that effect. Otherwise I have had the future Mrs. narrow it down to at least three choices and hash it out from there. See people almost 30 years old at this point and standardized test taking skills are still relevant. I can count the number of times on one hand where I have said, “I want this.”, and when I have I pretty much got my way because it truly was a small ask on my part.

At this point in the game we have all our major items checked off. We took our time and shopped around for the best price, but once we found what we wanted we jumped on it like a couple of rabid wolverines. Seriously people, make a game and start checking off things on your list as quickly as possible. I promise it will mitigate the stress and reduce the nonsense fighting. Getting things nailed down early minimizes the room for error, but does allow for it to happen when it is a non-issue and easy to fix.

The Perfect Mate

Let me just preface this with I don’t believe in perfection, but my fiancée is as close to perfection as I can get in terms of my partner in crime for life. You’ll also have to excuse some of my hetero skewed thoughts. At the end of the day I really don’t give a damn about anyone’s sexual orientation, but what I do care about is people being able to get along with their spouse/life mate.

Everyone needs to eat and unless you have a healthy pocket book or desire to go down early from blocked arteries eating out every night just isn’t an option. I suggest one of you be a decent cook.

I may get in trouble for this one, but if you stack my cooking skills against my future wife’s she’s got me beat by miles in the baking department, but when it comes down to dinner and such I’ll most likely outshine her. Scouting kick started learned life skills early for me and cooking was a central part of the troop I grew up in.

However, since I have no desire to be the primary meal creator in the house and I know she can cook I will most likely be the sous to her executive chef. Let me also be clear here that all adults in a household should be competent enough to cook a basic meal without burning the house down. “Mom” will occasionally get sick, need a break, or have their own stuff to take care which will preclude them from creating dinner that day.

Figure out how to divide up chores. I find that everyone does have a task they like to do. Either because they want that task done a specific way or it takes them away from everything else and gives them a few moments of Zen.

I also suggest finding out as much background knowledge on a person as possible. You might find they have a skill that compliments one of yours, you find it interesting and wish to learn more, or is just a bonus for life in general. In my case my fiancée has studied massage therapy. Although not her job anymore that skill set is not wasted. I’m sure everyone is thinking “you lucky bastard you”. Your god damn right I am. She makes dealing with my aches and pains easier, especially with the damage I have done to myself over the years.

However, its a two way street. I am a firm believer of give and take. I have done my best to learn from her so that when she requires a neck massage to relieve the tension of the day or help with a pulled muscle I’m not making the issue worse than it already is.

Let me put it in to perspective here. Find the person that makes you the least homicidal and make it work.

Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

As I sit here and my class works on their review packets for their upcoming tests I find myself with sometime to let my mind wander for a few minutes. After about 30 seconds of my brain trying to kick start itself I remembered that I had a fiancée that I haven’t seen and barely talked to going four days now. Such is the life of a person who has two jobs.

(This is the part where I would insert a picture of me rolling in a pile of cash, but since I have loans to pay……well I think everyone can do that math.)

I immediately had a rush of feelings. Guilt, depression, but ultimately happiness and love. For today I get a break from the doubles and can resume a somewhat normal routine and get to spend time with my better half. Based on her being my first thought I would say that the old credo holds true, Absence does make the heart grow fonder.

On an aside…I know that I am normally good for more than a quick few paragraphs of nonsense, but again if it isn’t clear I am a busy person. Unless I find a respite during the day I’m normally running on reserves by late evening and not firing on all cylinders. I still have words of wisdom and other anecdotes to share just going to be bite sized chunks for now.


She Said Yes

My fiancée said yes many moons ago, but every once in a while I have to remind her that she did. Ladies, remember when you are irritated or dumb founded by your other half that you said yes. We did give you an out and it’s long past it. Seriously though, we mean well just give us an extra second.

On the other side of this coin is the man who asked you to marry him. Believe on more than one occasion and sometimes daily we ask ourselves, “Did I really ask her?” Rest assured it passes as quickly as a muscle cramp does. We love you as much as the day we asked if not more.

For those of you in a same sex relationship or gender neutral one I think you can find the same sentiments apply to your relationship.